I just read a blog article called The 6 Most Shockingly Irresponsible “Fitspiration” Photos in which the author makes some great points about fitness misinformation and the way recent advertisements encourage people to abuse their bodies in the search to meet unrealistic expectations.
As I read, I realized that he and I are really talking about the same thing – trusting yourself, listening to yourself, and doing what’s right for YOU.
Honestly, though, that can be a lot easier said than done.
How do you know you aren’t buying into messages from advertising or getting caught up in trying to be like your friends?
What if you’re following what’s right for someone else but not for you?
How do you trust yourself when you’re making so many decisions in a day and there’s no one to tell you if you’re making the right one?
How do you know what your inner voice is saying when the fears and negative chatter in your head are so loud?
Here are few tips to help you with this.
1. Keep checking in with yourself.
Take time each day to come back to center. It’s easiest if you have a routine for doing this, like taking a few minutes first thing in the morning to sit quietly and get in touch with yourself. Some people find journaling helps them stay focused. Some people like to meditate. Find what works well for you.
The point is that you can’t just say, “From this day on, I’ll be true to myself” and then never veer from that. You aim for your goal, move forward, and then make course corrections as you get more clarity and new realizations.
When you find yourself feeling off, overwhelmed, scared or upset, check in with yourself to see what’s going on. This is a practice that takes cultivation.
Ironically, it’s can also take outside help. Sometimes we’re so caught up in what’s happening and how we’re feeling that we can’t connect with ourselves, only the muck we’re stuck in.
This brings us to tip #2.
2. Put yourself in situations and relationships that help you see your true self.
I call this staying in the conversation.
Find things like blog posts, teleseminars, and courses that help you look at yourself and your life to see where you are and aren’t being true to you.
Cultivate friends who support you in being yourself. Even one person like this can make a huge difference. Make intentions for your time together. Cheer each other on. Encourage each other to follow personal goals.
I’ve also found it invaluable to work coaches and mentors as well. Twice I’ve experienced big life changes when I signed on with a mentor. I’ve also worked with a number of healers and others who have each contributed to me in wonderful ways and helped me get clarity in ways I wasn’t getting it on my own.
How do you know who can help you? Well, there’s a really easy way to spot these folks – they are actively working at being the best THEM possible. They take personal responsibility for their lives and help you see what’s possible for you.
Their conversations are uplifting and you feel more empowered and more hopeful after spending time with them. You feel pulled toward being or working with them, even if your fears make you feel nervous about it.
3. Take responsibility for your life.
Be willing to let go of blaming others or your past for what you’re experiencing now.
I know this can be hard. You’ve probably experienced things that were painful, hard, maybe even shattering. I don’t make light of that at all. Believe me.
Taking responsibility can feel scary and unfair. But not taking responsibility leaves you feeling like a victim – unempowered and living in the past.
You don’t have to stay stuck in all that crap.
Which brings me to #4.
4. Clear out the old stuff.
This is the work I do with people. This is what I’ve done for myself. And over and over again, I see what a difference it makes.
We live in an incredible time, when ways to make deep and lasting changes are being discovered all the time. You no longer have to live with the pain from the past or the negative chatter in your mind. You can release the fears that sometimes feel so overwhelming.
Doing this creates the space for you and allows you to hear your own inner voice.
It lets you shine.
What I’m talking about isn’t a magic pill that you swallow once and then live trouble-free ever after. This is the real world and things are going to come up – especially because you’re coming more and more into your power.
As you move into your power, the old, heavy stuff can’t coexist with your new goals and visions of yourself. With your higher energy.
This is great! It means you’re making progress.
And I hear you saying, “Great? Are you kidding me? This feels scary, painful, and just plain ole crappy! If this is great, I’ll take average.”
I get it. But the thing is, you really don’t want average. You might wish you did sometimes, but you don’t.
You’re creating your own business or your own art. Your own life. And you don’t settle for average.
And you don’t want to stay stuck in this crap any longer.
Did you ever have the feeling when you were little of being excited that you’d outgrown something? 
That it no longer fit because you were growing up and how really cool that was? Think of it like that – an old jacket that used to protect you and keep you warm and now is too constricting.
Nothing’s wrong. It’s just that it doesn’t fit you any more. It’s time to let it go.
Letting it go is the key.
I’m opening a Fall Clearing Group that will begin October 2. If you’d like to clear what’s coming up for you and you’ve been in one of my prior groups or had a one-on-one session with me, then click here for more information and to register.
If you haven’t been in one of my prior groups or had a session with me, email me here and let’s talk.